Divorce has the potential to affect children negatively. After learning about the end of your marriage, your children may experience anger, sadness, depression or even ambivalence. To help children cope with divorce, some parents choose nesting.
Sometimes called bird nesting, nesting is a post-divorce arrangement that keeps the family home intact. With nesting, the kids always live in the same place. Each co-parent rotates into the family home while living in a separate location during non-parenting time.
Nesting requires cooperation
At the beginnings and ends of your scheduled parenting time, you and your former husband or wife must be willing to relocate to and from the family home. Consequently, for an effective nesting arrangement, you and your ex-spouse must be on good terms.
Nesting provides stability
Shuffling children between two households may discombobulate them. With nesting, your children always have the same place to call home, giving them access to a stable and predictable environment.
Nesting smooths custody transitions
Preparing the kids for the custody transition is often easier with nesting, as children do not have to pack or ready themselves emotionally to move temporarily to their other parent’s home. With nesting, there is also less chance of losing essential items, like homework or medication, or treasured ones, such as a security blanket or stuffed animal, during custody swaps.
Nesting does not have to last forever
A long-term nesting arrangement may be impractical. Fortunately, you, your ex-spouse and your kids do not have to nest forever. Nesting for a few months or until your children acclimate to their post-divorce world may help to minimize the negative toll your divorce may take on them.